I recently finished a brief Bible study by Beth Moore called, "Living Free". (Basically a much quicker version of "Breaking Free".) I learned a lot through it, and I'm planning on reading through it again b/c I feel like I missed a lot. I did get a song idea out of it though!
But the basic premise idea of the study was to dig into the Word, combine it with prayer, and don't let the enemy get a hold on your mind. This is definitely a struggle for me, and for everyone, I am sure.
So, all this to say... I've been working out with a trainer recently, and part of this whole working out thing is obviously to get healthy. My family has a history of heart disease, and I don't want to die from that. But another reason is b/c I know Kyle and I will want to start a family in the next couple of years, and I don't want to be so overweight that I develop gestational diabetes while pregnant. And while I have said that part out loud, Satan began to play a mind game with me. He started putting the idea in my head that if I started working out, dropped the weight that I wanted to drop, then I would have to immediately get pregnant. Which, quite frankly, I'm not ready - we're not ready - to bring kids into the picture. So those thoughts were scary and paralyzing. That one thought kept me from pushing myself in the way I needed to go, and I never shared it with anyone, not even Kyle.
That is, until we were with my parents on the way home from our family reunion a couple weeks ago.
My mom recently received her certification for a job title I don't remember, but she works for a health care company and counsels employees to improve their physical & mental health, etc. etc. So, she's obviously been using me as a sort of guinea pig. :) She was asking me questions about stuff with Dad & Kyle there in the car, and I finally just blurted out what I had been thinking. I prefaced it with, "This is going to sound completely crazy, but this is what I have been thinking." And once I said it out loud, it didn't have as much power over me anymore.
Which brings me back to the Bible study... Beth reminds us that scripture says to take every thought captive for Christ. And I know the more I do this, the harder that Satan is going to try and knock me down. And while I do get discouraged with the whole working out thing (I can barely walk this morning, and sitting down takes a lot longer!!), I know that through Christ, I can do anything!!
Thank you, Lord, that we don't have to be prisoners of our own minds b/c you have SET US FREE!!